10 May 2010
Hand-ballers in Barcelona?
I think I was supposed to run out into the streets rejoicing in the fact that Barcelona FC players Zlatan Ibrahimovic and Gerard Pique MIGHT be gay? I dropped the ball there and now fear that my gay membership card will be confiscated and that I will have to go into gay exile in somwhere like Albacete. My life is over and all thanks to the unnatural interest in what two consenting adults might or might now do in their free time.
My question to you all today is: why the obsession with homosexuality in football? Why is it so taboo to like a bit of cock and bum fun and also enjoy a kickabout? There isn't one openly gay footballer in the UK's top four divisions. Homosexuality is sometimes even used to smear footballers who are probably not gay at all. Cristiano Ronaldo (or CR9 as he is affectionately known here in Spain) may prance around looking like an expensively dressed wideboy chav but that doesn't make him the token team gayboy. Further north, British supporters chastise the more "sensitive" single players when the gutter press reveals that they horror of horrors enjoy reading the odd book.
In 2002, ex Chelsea manager Luiz Felipe Scolari even went as far as to declare:
"I've had players over the years who were single and read books and so others said they must be gay. I think being openly gay would be something very difficult to live with in football. You can get drunk and beat up your wife and that's accpetable, but if someone were to say "I'm gay" it's considered awful."
So awful that it ultimately lead to Justin Fashanu's sad and untimely demise. His career was never the same after he was "encouraged" to come out by the Sun.
The now infamous photo of Ibrahimovic and Pique is very sweet and non-threatening. Ibrahimovic's reaction to it's publication is sadly not very sweet or unthreatening. In fact, it prompted gay association COGAM to demand an apology. Whatever the truth in these rumours, feathers have been ruffled in Barcelona FC, curiously just at a time when players really need to concentrate most. The end of a very tightly fought battle for the top of the league with archrival Real Madrid is nigh and dirty tricks cannot be ruled out.
My only pique with the pic are the jeans. Are gays allowed to wear jeans like those? I must check the manual.